Guide to Going out and Getting everything for FREE (even dudes)

Preliminary Steps and Rules:
- be female. If you can't achieve this step make sure you are with a group of females.
- if you are not skanky by nature, just don't skank it up. It's distracting, not sexy.
- find a place to go out with several bars/clubs within walking distance of each other. This model was tested on 6th street which has about 7,000 bars within shouting distance of each other. But 5 or 6 should be good too.

Step 1:
- Choose a random night to go out. Best night of the week? Tuesday. It's important that there be no lines forming to get inside.

Step 2:
- Start early, but not too early. Get out between 10:30 and midnight. Every bar/club wants to get to capacity as early in the night as possible and will try to get you in their place.

Step 3:
- Take the largest group you can handle. Around 8 people or so is good. Make sure there's about 1 dude to every 3 or four girls. Decide ahead of time where you are going or elect one person (preferably the most sober one) to make ALL the decisions that evening. They will talk to bouncers and lead the group. The person, as you can see by the image to your right, is usually the most magenta and least grey of the group.

Step 4:
- Walk away from the bar/club. Pick a place you want to go to and walk past it as if you have no intention of going in. It's early in the night so there's no line, plus the bouncer sees a giant group of mostly girls walking away from the bar, at this point you will get offered free cover, reduced drink prices, a left kidney, ANYTHING!! to just take the whole group inside. Whatever the first offer is, just look at the bouncer like he's speaking Afrikaans. The second offer will be better. If you have no luck, just walk past the bar and on to the next one and repeat this step until it takes. If it still doesn't work you may have gone out too late, be out on the wrong night, or have too many guys with you. Try again later.

Step 5:
- Once in the bar, get whatever free thing you were offered and get it quickly. If you and your buddies got a free drink, make sure as many of you as possible tip the bartender. Make friends! Take a look around. If you notice any spunky female bar promoters, just finish your drink and move on to the next place. If you like the bar have some fun and enjoy your night. Make whatever good impression you can on the staff (maybe let your group spokesperson do this, they're least likely to do something stupid) and remember it for the next time you go out.

Step 6:
- Leave the bar/club with all (or most) of your clothes on and all ( or most) of the people you came with.

Feel free to test this out in your locales. It works, I promise. The only place it wouldn't work, is prolly South bend. We went out with a group of like 9 of us including two guys. Over the night we hit up 4 bars/clubs, never paid any cover, got a free round at the first place and got free drinks at the third place. (The third place was telling us it'd be $2 cover each. That's when we walked away. The bouncer ran after us, offered free cover and gave us all free drink cards)

Peace all. Drink responsibly. Drink for free.

G